Unfit to be a Mother ☹
Poe's burial at sea.
By and by, Poe didn’t get better. She ate less and less through the weekend and I felt both helpless and hopeless to make her well again. After asking around, I found out about a veterinarian in town, loaded my sick bird into in my bike basket, and pedaled off…
Upon finding the veterinarian clinic, a gentle man took Poe in his hands and looked her over.
“Elle est tres faible et megre. (She’s very weak and skinny)” He said. He went on to explain that it’s extremely difficult to raise a seabird chick from such a young age. “It’s almost impossible to replicate the nutrients that the mother bird would provide by partially digesting the bones and scales and skin of the small fish that an adult tern of this species would eat,” he explained. I knew he was right. I had been feeding her mashed up pieces of fresh fish, but mostly just the meat—no bones or scales.
“Force her to eat,” he said. “Open her beak and put the fish way in the back and she will swallow it.” I nodded even though I had already been doing that. He sold me a nutrient supplement for cats to try to boost her nutrient intake and I left feeling only slightly more hopeful.
I gave Poe a dose of the supplement back at Swell, but after an hour, she could hardly lift her head anymore. It was too late. She took her last breath from this world as I held her cupped in my hands. To witness the fragility of life—one moment there, the next gone—hit me hard. I cried and stroked her still warm feathers.
9 Comments
CR
March 15, 2010Ms Liz,
Really sorry to hear about your friend’s death. I’ve spent a fair amount of time around death and it’s always so — absolute. Especially hard to lose a friend that you have the responsibility of caring for. My heart goes out to you.
On a different note – I’ve been following your journey from Bozeman, MT. Grew up in CA and lived for a short time on a 30′ Cal in the Santa Barbara Harbor. Surfed Sandspit, Rincon, Sands, and would walk up to Razorblades on the railroad tracks, ducking into the weeds whenever I heard a car.
All this to say that I’m very much enjoying your journey, your attitude, your adherance to sound principles and the guidance you get from quotes that fill your living space. Ernest Shackelton would be proud.
Keep charging. Keep writing, and know that you are brightening the lives of many.
Respectfully,
CR
mike
March 16, 2010Poe had a short time, but it was sweetened by your care. Without your tenderness she would have suffered more. Smile at what you have done for her and thank you for sharing with us. I have wondered about her.
Mike
Kevin, Palo Alto, CA
March 16, 2010You went above and beyond!
steve rupp
March 16, 2010It may not have worked out for your young charge but that doesn’t diminish a damn fine effort. I suspect that had you known you would have eaten the raw unscaled fish for proper regurgitation. It was a valiant effort and I am sure Lil Poe traveled to the next bird world spiritually fulfilled by his his humans love fest. Well done!
mo
March 16, 2010The fragility of life on any level sobers us, humbles us, and inspires us to spread our wings and fly while we can. You are flying higher and farther than most of us reading your words would ever dare go. You are succeeding every day. Namaste.
Chris
March 16, 2010A beautiful burial Liz. Thanks for sharing the photo and the story of Poe. I’m reminded of Rachel Carson: “For all at last returns to the sea–to Oceanus, the ocean river, like the everflowing stream of time, the beginning and the end.”
CaptTroy
March 17, 2010Many others would have left Poe to die in the cold alone but you were there to comfort Poe! You did well!!!!
Kay Brook
March 19, 2010Liz I am so sorry about Poe, but you did your best. Most people would not have even made an effort. You go girl.
Chris Morgan
March 20, 2010Beautiful burial Liz. Thanks for sharing the photo and the story of Poe. I’m reminded of Rachel Carson: “For all at last returns to the sea–to Oceanus, the ocean river, like the everflowing stream of time, the beginning and the end.” Like Poe, we’re all headed back to the sea.